It’s the first day of school and I am looking for Mia. Well, not the original Mia. The original Mia has moved on to the first grade and will not be in Eli’s class. My son Eli has a dual diagnosis of Down Syndrome and Autism. Last year my wife and I decided to go against the advice of every member of our IEP team and put him in a General Ed classroom.
There were many times when I questioned our decision, but more often than not, I felt like we had made the right call. Eli is young, so we decided another year of kindergarten would serve him well. The only problem is Mia is moving on and will not be in his class. So I am standing here looking over a sea of kindergarten faces wondering if there is a Mia among them?
Who is Mia? Well, one day last year my wife volunteered me to go on the class field trip. I reluctantly went. One of us has to go because the teacher and aides are not allowed to pick up Eli, which inevitably needs to be done on a field trip. I did my best to get him to transition from one exhibit to the next, but sometimes I had to throw him on my shoulder and away we went with the rest of the class. One time, as I was about to pick him up when the teacher said, “Rick, let me see if Mia can get him to move.”
I asked, “Who is Mia?” She smiled pleasantly and replied, “Oh Mia is adorable and Eli loves her. She can get him to do all kinds of things no one else can.” Wait…WHAT!? Next thing I know this beautiful little girl walks over, Eli lights up like a Christmas tree, and wouldn’t you know it, we are walking to the next station. For the rest of the school year, Mia became a household name under our roof. “Mia made Eli a card…Mia walked over to Eli before school and just started talking to him!…Seriously, she engages him…When everyone else struck out, Mia got Eli to move from recess back to the classroom.”
It was a major leap of faith putting Eli in a General Ed classroom. It was one of the most difficult decisions my wife and I have ever made. Pressure increased, prayers lengthened, and anxiety went through the roof! I mean, how would Eli be treated by his peers? How would they view this kid who was shorter than everyone, clearly looked differently, acted abnormally, spoke incoherently, and was not potty trained? He was and is an easy target, and the helplessness we felt cannot be understated.
So let me tell you who Mia is. SHE IS THE HOPE OF FULL INCLUSION. Kids like Eli cannot blossom without kids like Mia. She is what every parent of a special needs child aches for. That one peer who can see past the shortcomings or awkward or drool. She is full of tolerance, friendship, love, and sees light where others do not. She is a rarity, the future president of the Best Buddies Club, and to us, the parents of kids with special needs, she is a miracle.
